I put the emphasis on OBSESSIVE becasue that is what I am I guess. Obsessed with being a success. Obsessed with proving doubters and haters wrong. I also have now created an obsession with one Aubrey Plaza. But enough about that hankering for that gorgeous woman, let's get to the meat and potatoes of this blog. My obsession with other things... and why some people may construed it as bad.
My obsession with being successful, you could say, can go hand in hand with my obsession with proving my doubters wrong. Yes, I'm obsessed with success. But frankly you don't have to have the astrological sign of Scorpio to have that obsession... or do you? Anwyho, my drive to be a success comes from the fact that I have done a few things in my life that have not been so successful. Deep down (this is where the resentful and passionate part comes to play) I feel like those failures may determined to others who I am. Which I am NOT. I am not a failure. Now that I am doing stand up comedy and acting (and by years end a production company) I am more obsessed to succeed than ever. I don't think I've ever had anytime in my life to prove this until now. This part of my 36 years on Earth is THE time to prove I can be a success... and hopefully kill the feelings of resentment for failing so many times in my life. And if it means I crack a few eggs to make my omelette then so be it. And I will be passionate about getting to that level by any means necessary. Yes, I have some standards but there will come days I will throw that out the window to get what needs to be done.
Now there are those out there that will take this as "Oh my God, he's become such an asshole since he's decided to want to move to LA and YADA YADA YADA" No, I'm an asshole when need be. I don't wake up in the morning and go "You know, I think I'll be an asshole today". I do wake up every morning wondering "What can I do to make myself a success today." Yeah, I totally sound like a douchebag when I think like that. But that's where my obsession comes in. I think about that when I wake up and I go to bed thinking "Did I do anything successful today?" and if I answer NO to that question, guess what THEN. I am compulsively thinking about that until I go to sleep. And the cycle continues. I think it will continue until I go to my grave. Just that part of me that will never die. Which I am fine with. If that is something people cannot handle about me (which could explain why I'm single because I KNOW it's not because my looks or by choice) then honestly they need to handle that themselves. If it means they leave my life then so be it. If it means they stick around me then all I say is "buckle up and enjoy the ride that is Richard Gustason".
Okay, now for the fun. My obsession with Aubrey Plaza. What is there NOT to like. She's pretty, smart, and funny. And I am obsessed with her to the point where to promote shows I use her in memes. Oh and made a t-shirt with her gorgeous face on it (yep, that's obsession). If you want to see the shirt don't be afraid to ask me on Twitter. But the obsession I have now (which will cause hilarity or anxiety on Earth depending on the person) is knowing she has NO FUCKING CLUE WHO I AM! Pretty darn funny obsession if you ask me. I wonder if any normal human being feels like that with a celebrity. Wait... if they did then they would not be normal would they? Crap, I'm not normal. Anyways, it is funny to think I do this and thinking "Oh she's gonna like this or that" and then... nothing. Maybe that is the funny part about it. ALRIGHT... I have a running joke for sometime now in my stand up. (Note to self: start writing this into your act)
I want to this and this is where shame is taking a coffee break. Yes, I dream of intimate sensual inter-relations with Aubrey Plaza. But after visiting a site called dreammood.com I found this little nugget and, well, I think it rings true about me:
"To dream that you are kissing or having sex with a celebrity indicates your drive to be successful. Consider what qualities or movies you associate this celebrity with or what makes this celebrity famous for clues as to where and what you want to achieve success in. Alternatively, the dream may just represent your fascination or obsession with this particular celebrity."
Yep, me right there. All in one cute little paragraph with some other clutter to fill in to make it look pretty. So yeah, I admit I;m obsessive
Well thanks guys for reading this little blog of mine. And now I must leave you until next time because I have things to do and objects and people to obsess over. And if by chance I fall into that category of me being the object of your obsession I graciously thank you for that because I know the feeling.
You can follow me on Twitter: @richgustason
You can also find me on Facebook: facebook.com/richardgactor
Until next time friends, remember to come for the sexy and stay for the funny.